Thorns

7 "To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me.
8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me.
9 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
10 That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

--2 Corinthians 12:7-10

I was reading this tonight at the church building after our exercise class was over and they went home. I've often wondered what Paul's thorn in his side was. Naturally, what the thorn was isn't important. What is important is how he delt with it. He went to God. Three times as a matter of fact! God's answer to Paul was giving him what it takes to endure the hardship. God didn't remove the hardship. He strengthened him with it. How beautiful is that? Makes me think of how a pearl is made from a little stone. Friction!

I can't help but put myself in this situation that Paul is talking about. I remember going to high school and taking every Home Economics class they had available in order to prepare myself for family life....being a wife and a mom. That was my dream. That's all I've ever wanted (aside from everyone going to Heaven). I spent my whole life up to my wedding day preparing myself for motherhood. In high school I had decided I was going to have 12 kids! That must be why I never got asked out on a date.

Well, my wedding day came and I became a wife. Next was suppose to be motherhood. Because that's what my plan was. I had BIG plans to show the rest of the world how do raise children correctly and be the information queen when it came to giving out advice on childbirth since I had studied it so heavily. I couldn't see my head swelling so big that it was going to burst from all of the fullness of my vast intellect.....HAHAHAHA! That's a 16 year old for 'ya! I knew what I knew and the world was gonna' hear about it, by golly. (OH MY! *roll eyes*)

Well, as many of my readers know, I have not given birth and I have been married since 1997. I asked God many times (more than Paul's 3 times) to take this problem from me. Guess what? I get the same kind of answer that Paul got. It sounds alot like this: I'm here with you and that is enough.

I have begun to feel that it was actually best that I didn't give birth. It would have created a monster......me, the all-knowing baby person. In other words, a real know-it-all jerk that no one wants to be around or listen to.

I am truly grateful to God for just telling me "Shhhh. I'm here." for so many years. Sometimes it takes a long time to calm your children down when they're upset. It took God about 6 years to get me to just relax about my "thorn". Actually, to be quite honest, it took ME 6 years to LET God calm me down. There! That's better!

So, here I am now, with the thorn still in my side. Am I destroyed? No. Am I weak? Yes but not like I was. Is God still saying He's here with me and that is enough? Yes. Do I believe Him? You better believe it! You see, when I am weak, it's then that God is strong in my life and people take notice. People are turned off when I am strong but when God is strong, people come to Him like crazy!

Thank God for thorns! They're exactly what we need!


*edit* Pearls are not made by friction. I got things mixed up concerning diamonds being formed by pressure and all. Oh well....guess that just goes along with my post huh? :)